Dr. Julie Osborn, a therapist specializing in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), shares her experiences in the field and helps her listeners; addressing the issues they face and the situations they find themselves in. CBT is a short-term, goal-orientated psychotherapy treatment that takes a hands-on, practical approach to problem solving. Dr. Osborn teaches how cognitive behavioral therapy can be used everyday in our lifelong pursuit of happiness.
- MAY 28, 2021
Do other people get annoyed with you because you act or react a certain way?Do you feel like you’re always messing up or losing relationships because of certain behaviors?Do you feel hopeless and stuck in an endless pattern of negative thoughts and automatic reactions?In this episode, Dr Julie h…
- MAY 21, 2021
How To Reframe Your Feelings
Do you struggle with negative feelings – anxiety, loneliness, depression, resentment, anger, fear?Do you wish you could just make them all go away?In this episode, Dr Julie shares with you a CBT technique that will empower you to reframe your thoughts and feelings in a positive way, bringing yo…
- MAY 14, 2021
Are You Judging Me?
Do you feel exhausted trying to keep up with other people’s expectations of you?Do you feel like you’re constantly being judged?In this episode, Dr Julie looks at the insecurities and anxieties many of us feel in response to other’s perceived judgement of us. She explains some of the reasons these in…
- MAY 7, 2021
How To Assert Yourself
Do you struggle to communicate your desires and preferences?Do you feel like people walk all over you and you are powerless to change it?In this episode, Dr Julie talks about what it means to be assertive in a healthy way, how it can benefit you and how to do it. Using the power of Cognitive Beh…
- APR 30, 2021
Understanding Personality Disorders
What is the difference between personality quirks and a personality disorder?Why do people have personality disorders?If you’re in a relationship with someone with a personality disorder, what is the best way to deal with that? In this episode, Dr Julie Osborn helps demystify personality disorders, ex…
Words are really helpful, in case you hadn’t noticed.
Sometimes it helps to add a word or two. And sometimes it helps to take one or two words away.
For instance, the trash will probably get taken out more better if you say “Can you please take out trash” instead of “Can you please take out the trash sometime in this century?”
And saying “Thank you” is a lot more effective when you leave out the “NOT!” at the end.
And some words are better off being replaced.
For example, compare these two sentences:
“I should put the clothes in the dryer.”
“I will put the clothes in the dryer at the commercial.”
It’s easy to see why the word “should” doesn’t work. “Should” isn’t part of a plan or strategy. It’s really just part of a campaign to make yourself feel like you’re failing.
I shouldn’t use the word failing, now should I?
Heh heh heh. Get it?
I try not to use the word should. I try to stick with saying whether I will or I won’t. It’s more honest. And then I don’t get stuck with negative baggage. It’s really negatory to think through the analysis of “I WOULD if I were just stronger, better, faster and more disciplined.”
That’s not a helpful analysis.
As for adding words, there is no better word to add to your sentences than “now” – or it’s cousin phrase “at this time.”
Consider these sentences:
“I can’t do math.”
“I can’t do math at this time.”
People who say “I can’t do math” are basically admitting that they checked out of math in the third grade and haven’t considered trying it again since then. If you’re that person, trying saying to yourself “I can’t math at this time.”
Now seriously, doesn’t that sound ridiculous?
What in the world could possibly keep you from doing math at this time? You’re an adult. You can figure it out.
It’s not rocket science, unless it’s rocket science math.
But if it’s regular math, like figuring out a tip or doubling a recipe, you can do it!
Let’s try another one:
“I can’t help myself.”
That’s a good one.
“I must eat an entire family size box of chocolates. I cannot help myself.”
Really? At this time? You can’t help yourself at this time?
I doubt that’s true.
I bet you really could help yourself if you wanted to help yourself.
Maybe you just don’t want to help yourself. In which case, say the following:
“I cannot help myself because I do not want to help myself.”
But it is what is.
At this time.
The thing about talking to yourself is that most of us do it.
Some of us do it more regularly than others. And we shall remain nameless.
But here’s what I want to know:
Do you talk to yourself when you most need it? And do you know what to say?