Skip to content

Breakfast at Tiffany’s

Ruby in Paradise came out in 1993.

The film won the Grand Jury Prize for Dramatic Feature at the 1993 Sundance Film Festival. It was also nominated for six Independent Spirit Awards.

Ashley Judd  won for Best Female Lead.

And Ashley Judd was mesmerizing.  Her young Ruby was full-of-pain, lost in her world of wondering who and where she should be.

As Ruby wrote in her journal, I heard her talking to my 30-something self,  assuring me I wasn’t the only one out there feeling hurt and unsure about how things would turn out.

When I saw Ruby in Paradise playing tonight, I had to watch.

Ruby in Paradise is on my Breakfast at Tiffany‘s List.

The Breakfast at Tiffany’s List is my list of movies I have to watch immediately when I see them or are reminded of them..

You know what I mean.

You have one too.

Read more

The Best OCD Listen Ever.


220,334 views Jun 27, 2022

In this episode, I explain the biology and psychology of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)—a prevalent and debilitating condition. I also discuss the efficacy and mechanisms behind OCD treatments—both behavioral and pharmacologic as well as holistic and combination treatments and new emerging treatments, including directed brain stimulation. I explain the neural circuitry underlying repetitive “thought-action loops” and why in OCD, the compulsive actions merely make the obsessions even stronger.

Read more

Not everything is depression.

It never occurred to me that I might not be depressed.

I mean, really.

If all you think about is death, that equals depression, right?

Well, actually, as it turns out, no.

I think about death all the time because my OCD brain is obsessed with death.

As it happens, it’s also obsessed with some other things.

Actually, if you tell my brain that it absolutely cannot obsess about death, it will just find something else more horrible than death to obsess about.

Like torture, for instance. Or war. Or terrorism.

Read more

Credible hope.

False hope is a lie. It will break your trust.

Hope without details is nothing..
It will shatter your confidence if you can’t even imagine what it might possibly look like.

Credible hope is the promise that something is out there.
Something is out there.
Something real. And reasonable. And within reach.

And you should be hopeful
because we are committed
to putting our hands on it as soon as we possibly can
so we can relieve you from your pain.

Telling someone to be hopeful isn’t as helpful as giving them a reason to be hopeful.

Tell them what you will do..
Will you call them? Bring them? Take them?
Will you find a doctor? Research medications? Explore treatment options?

Make a plan right now and say it out loud.
Make a plan and write it down.
Make a plan and text it.
Make sure the person in pain knows what the next step is and how soon the next step will be taken.

Give hope, yes.
But be sure to make it the valuable kind of hope.
The kind of hope that means something now while the pain feels so so so bad.
Make it the kind of credible hope that enables the person to get through one more day.
Or night.
Until things can start getting better.

Maybe It’s Time.


Sometimes the things we’re doing aren’t helping as much as they helped when we first started doing them.
Sometimes it’s time to reevaluate what we’re doing and ask if we still have the same needs?

Because maybe if we stopped and took a look, we would see our needs had changed.
Or maybe we would see our needs were no longer getting met.

Maybe we originally got helped.
And that was good. It was good we got helped.
But maybe we only got helped to a point. 

Maybe we got helped to a point and now we need to get helped from that point to the next point.

So maybe now it’s time to figure out the next thing to do.


Back To Top